Decisions, Decisions, Descions

Today is a much better day for me, well so far anyway. The weather is a little rainy but I think it is going to clear off.

Beofre I get into my decisions/problems of the day, I have decided to reread two very good books. One How to Rig an Election by Allen Raymond and the other is Obamaland by James Delingpole. The fist book is a true story about the author and his time work for the GOP. While I'm a staunch Republican and I don't normally like to knock the team I'm on, the GOP and the people in it have done some pretty sillything. The other book Obamaland, was very interesting book because it was written by a British author. He gave a different twist to but was still agruing against the Obama administration. While being bored to death in microeconomics, our professor started talking about labor unions and politics folllowed. My mind has a tendency to wonder and that's how I came to think about the books.

I hate making decision. I'm not a liberated woman and have no problems with people making decisions for. I have one important decision that needs to be made within the week and two that I just need to be thought of.



I like to be lazy so, I'll look at the least important of my decisions which is study abroad. I'm not going in my sophmore year but probably in my junoir year. My academic advisor keeps harping on me to get the information for it but I have a year. My question is: Where do I want to go? My top three picks would be France, Scotland, or England.

The French one I'm rather uncertain about because my French is well tres mal. On the other hand, what better way to get better at it than to go where they speak it but it would be a lot of trouble.

England or Scotland would probably be my first two picks but there not exactly exotic, but then again, neither is France is.

My bigger and more immediate decision is whether or not to go to C--- with J---. If I do than I going to have to come clean to people, namely my parents. There would be no way for me to lie my way out of it. I wouldn't be there for work, I would miss one day of class. I know my mother knows something is up. My father has no clue of course. One of the advantages of being the illegitament child of a wealthy man who doesn't legally recognise you as his child. You don't live with him and so he doesn't know what going on.
I'm 20 and he's not married so why should I care what they think? Well, I shouldn't but do. There's absolutely nothing worng with what I'm doing. Breaha has other opinions on the matter but I'm politely refusing to listen to my bestest friend. I love her to pieces but sometimes she just needs to bud out and leave me alone to make my own mistakes.

I did not do so hot in my micro test (Kitten groans while looking at her 75%) and I thought I did so well on the test. Danmed graphs, tables, and formulas. I have got to get an A on my next test and home work assignments to keep my A average in the class and then I'm not sure. I did do rather well on my essay about the NHS, though. I still do not know about stupid international accounting assignment I BS my way through.
My group members and I finally got together in English. Yeah, now I don't have to run them down. We're supposed to be meeting K---'s room at 4:30 to discuss our plan of attack. Plans of attack always me think of mercenaries or spies, and that always lead to a very steamy daydream in the middle of French, which is starting now.

Yeah, It's Friday!

It's finally Friday. Survey of SIC has been cancellled so all I have to do is get through French, then it's shopping time:) I'm still not sure if Breaha is spending the night, but I'm interested in the shopping than anything else. The book I have been waiting for forever has finally decided to come out( Kitten hops around from place to place excitidly).

Kitten has a very important desicion to make. Does she want to want to go to Mexico or somewhere else for vacation. I was in Mexico less than two months ago and in late June/ early July it will be so hot. I was think about going to Russia with Cross Cultural Solutions. It went with them to Peru a few years back and it was a lot of fun and not as exhausting as Intercambio would be. If I went with Intercambio this summer, I would have to do construction again and that about killed me in January.

Of course, I'll be going alone. Mom and Dad are too busy and Breaha will have things she wants to do, I'm not even going to bother with Chris and J--- will be busy. Oh well, I've pretty much gotten used to traveling by myself and besides, there's no one there to tell what and what not to do;)

I Hate Group Projects!

Kitten feels lazy today. I'm all worn out from study for tests. There about a billion things I should be doing and people I need to see but all I want to do is nap( preferably in the warm sunlight).

Not much happened today, other than the normal things. In micro. we started on chapter 14, in Comp. we listened to Ms. B lectured on giving presentation, and in French we started telling time.

Going back up to Comp. and group projects for a minute, I am not too happy with may group. Why is it when ever you're placed into groups to do some sort of project it turns out to be a disaster. I asked to be switched from night life to history because the people in my former group thought it would be fun to sneak into night clubs and go to frat parties. Why I don't mind a little partying now and then, I don't think my parents would like it very much if they had to bail me out of jail.

Now that I have been switched to history, though, no one has bothered to contacted me and give me details. I have a feeling a got into a group that really doesn't care and getting a bad grade is almost as bad as getting arrest(well, not quite that bad, I guess;).

Is it even possible to have a good group projected. Since I have started my freshman year here, even been in four groups and all four were like a damned soap opera, and while I love the soaps, I hate drama in real life.

A Good Wednesday!

Today has been a really good day, which surprised me. I think that I did well on my accounting test, for once. I was the first one done and I didn't have too much trouble over all. The only part I'm worried about is applying overhead. I credited cash but I'm not sure that's right.

We started work on our robots in Survey of SIC today and I was partnered with H---. She seems just about as baffaled with it as me and the other two are computer genuses so, no matter what we come up with it's going to look, well.... but that's ok, because I think we're going to have a comical time just to assemble and program the weird looking thing. Yes, it looks very interesting. Theirs might win a prize for good programming but ours should take the prize for oddest looking.

I was looking online at borders.com for erotica and stumbled onto that very popular word I hear all the time: feitish. I thought a feitish was an obession about something, which it is, but the context I kept hearing/reading the word did not make sense. It was always mentioned with something sexual so I googled it. There is apparently a sexual feitish too, in which a part or thing becomes for important then the person( if I undertood wikipedia right). I quess you learn something new everyday.

Keeping with sexual thing, I got a reply from Breaha about my research. She hadn't heard of anything I had mentioned. Are we both that nieve?

I get to pick out my classes for this summer and fall. I haven't the faintest idea why I'm so excited. L---, my Survery of SIC professor said that I could still have Accounting Informtation Systems as a major but it just be an individualized major, so I'm going to ask Jeanie about it today.

I'm debating on whether or not to change my profile picture. I feel that's a little plain but I can't decide whether it looks sophicated or dull. My first choice was to put the picture that I hav put on this post as my profile pic. If I did that though, and I ever made this site open or even passwork protected, then it would make me look a little juvenille, won't it? Maybe I can find a more elborate mask, that might work.

Going back to Breaha, she says that she has some exciting new for me. I'm dying to know what it is because Breaha acted like it was important. I think it has something to with Michael or she got excepted here. I'm guessing the latter, I hope anyway. I want her as my roommat next year.

Playtime

My microeconomics test went fairly well( Kitten purrs contedly with herself. Now all I have to do is get ready for the blasted accouting test tomorrow. On a down side, I got 75%(C) on my citiation test. Oh, well, I have A's in the rest of that course so it shouldn't hurt me that much

Breaha might be staying with me Friday! We have a lot of shopping planned. She wants to go to several stores at home and then we're planning to go to.... Not that I have anything in particular to shop for, it's always nice to get out.

Speaking of Breaha, I need to get some pictures of her. The only ones I have I from almost a year ago. If only she weren't so camera shy. I feel a little hypocritical because I hate to have my picture taken too.

Breaha said that she wanted Kitten's research so Kitten sent it to her;). I'm still waiting for her reply. She probably all ready knows all that but I was feeling a little naughty.

I need to wash my hair. I washed it last night but it's still a little oily. Maybe that is what I'll look for Friday. I'll go to different salons and see if they have anything new to work on my flat, lifeless hair.( And makeup, hence the cute pic of a kitty playing with brushes)

Hum, a message was juts left on my phone during Enlgish. I wonder who that can be. (sighs) I'll have to return the call but not just this minute. I know what he wants but I won't and can't. I have to much homework to do and I would just like to stay away from him right now...

Am I Attracted to You? Why?

I was having a rather rough day in my last post. I have decided that I am going to do something about my littel problem but I don't wish to talk about it tonight.

Why is it that a person feels comfortable around some people but not other. There are just some people that we just don't click with I guess. Funny though, it seems that the ones that we should have common interest with are the ones that we find ackward being around. While, there are times when a person gets an attachment to people with whom they have nothing in common. That's is what normally happens to me any way. Maybe it's just me because I never her anyelse say that.

Is it the opposites attract thing or is it something else. Could it be that the intrigue us or that they show a part of us that lacking and so we wish to fill the void? And what about the people we are not attracted to( not necessarily in a sexual way.) Maybe we feel intimdated by people who have the same interest for fear that they know more than we do?

I feel in a thoughtful mood tonight but it seems I just rambling and unfortunately, I have mountains of homework to do.

Innocent? Not Any More.

I read an old romance novel that I used to love. It has a very sweet and innocent plot and the more intimate parts are very tame. Funny, they didn't seem tame three years ago. The fact the book bored and left me wanting more surprised and shamed me. I'm not that innocent any more, unlike the little kitty to the left.

If I could change that part of my life, I would. Maybe I still can but I doubt it. Now things are a little out of my control. Oh well, I guess I just have to lay in the bed I made.

Here's a poem that's stuck in my head:

I would I were A Careless Child

By: Lord Byron

1

I would I were a careless child,

Still dwelling in my Highland cave,

Or roaming through the dusky wild,

Or bounding over the dark blue wave;

The cumbrous pomp of Saxon pride,

Accords not with the free born soul,

Which loves the mountains craggy side,

And seeks the rocks where billows roll.

2

Fortune, take back these cultur'd lands,

Take back this name of slendid sound!

I hate the touch of servile hands,

I hate the salves that cringe around;

Place me among the rocks I love,

Which sound to oceans wildest roar;

I ask but this-again to rove

Through the scenes my youth hath known before.

3

Few are my years, and yet feel the

World was ne'er designed for me

Ah! why do darkning shades conceal

The hour when man must cease to be?

Once I beheld a splendid dream,

A visionary dream of bliss;

Truth!-wherefore did thy hated beam

Awake me to a word like this?

4

I lov'd- but those I love are gone;

Had friends, my early friends are fled.

How cheerless feels the heart alone,

When all its former hopes are dead!

Though gay companions, o'er the bowel

Dispel awhile the sense of ill,

Though Pleasure stirs the maddening soul,

The heart-the heart- is lonely still

5

How dull, to hear the voice of those

Whom Rank or chance, whom Wealth or Power,

Have made, though neither friends nor foes,

Associates of the festive hour.

Give me again a faithful few,

In years and feelings still the same,

And I will fly the midnight crew,

Where boisterous joy is but a name.

6

And Woman, lovely woman! thou,

My hope, my comforter, my all!

How cold must be my bossom now,

When e'en thy smiles begin to pall!

Without a sigh would I resign,

This busy scene of splendid Woe,

To make that calm contentment mine,

Which virtue knows, or seems to know.

7

Fain would I fly the haunts of men-

I seek to shun, not hate mankind;

My breast requires a sullen glen,

Whose gloom may suit a darkened mind.

Oh! that to me the wings were given

Which bears the turtle to her nest!

Then would I cleave the vault of Heaven,

To flee away, and be at rest.

~Lord Byron

It's Finally Spring

It's spring! Yesterday was offical the first day of spring and I'm so happy. Today is beautiful, the sun is shining and I'd say it is about 50 degrees outside.

Breaha couldn't spend the night last night. She was called into work and I don't think she was feeling very well. Tonight I'm going to send her picture of a cute kitty. Maybe that will make her feel better. As far as the sleepover goes, it didn't upset me because it did give me time to work on a few lessons.

I still have the NHS essay but I will be finishing that up later this evening. I have decided that if I work for an hour then I get to do what I want for an hour. I think that will keep me pretty motivated. I would also like to get my microeconomice study guide made up tonight. That will just leave me accounting to work on and I might be able to do some of that tonight as long as I don't need my book, seeing as I left it at home.

Speaking of classes, my academic advisor finally got back with me. I'm scheduled to meet with her on Wednesday March 25 at 3:30. She's going to schedule both my summer and fall class. I love finding out what classes I'm going to have later(to bad the enthusasim does not last through the class:).

Six weeks and it's over, well, until summer classes begin anyway. I'm both excited and really tired, but not burnt out.

J---- wants to see me but I told him I couldn't. I'll tell more later but I just don't feel like getting into it right now, I'm in to springy of a mood.

Nightlife

Why does it seem like, whenever I am put in a group, it turns out lousy. I have had only one good group project and that was with ID 100, and even then, there were problems. In Compostion class, we are doing a project called, "The Real Terre Haute," where we have to portray Terre Haute the way it really is. Eeveryone was put into groups of four or five. My group consist of Chesey, Jackie, and Brooke. All these girls are on the basketball time. I think fate likes to amuse herself with me. I hate sports. These girls are somewhat rebellious and well... let's just say inventive with their ideas on how to portray Terre Haute nightlife.

We have discussed buying beer, going to a bar, wandering into a frat, and much more. Why I like to have fun every know and then, I'd rather not get arrested. Something tells me I would not like jail and I look horrible in orange. I have been tempted to ask Miss Bowden if it would be possible to relocate me to another group but something tells me that she wouldn't. These last few weeks of school are going to be both interesting and infuriating.

Speaking of Composition class, my essay on the NHS is due in a week but I just cannot get motivated to do it. I know that if I just forced myself to sit down and work on it then, it would all come together quickly. I was supposed to work on it tonight, and I did, somewhat. Does printing off a few articles out and reading them count? Probably not. I don't feel extremely tired so maybe I can work on it a little tonight.

The essay isn't the only thing not getting done, my summer class schedule has yet to be made out but time, it's not my laziness; it's my academic advisor's. I know Jeanni is a busy woman but no one is so busy they can't check their calender and email a date to a student. Manners do seem to be lacking around here lately.

Breaha is supposed to be spending the night tomorrow which makes me excited since we haven't had a sleep over since the fall. I better get used to having her around because it looks like we'll be able to room together after all. It would be nice to have a roommate. Having not only the bedroom but the bathroom has been nice and has given a chance to see what living allone is trully like but it is somewhat lonely. I think Breaha and I will get along nicely.

While I will do all most anything for Breaha I have had second thoughts on that FaceBook website that I joined. Had I been able to join anommously, then I wouldn't have had so many reservations but I do value my privacy and I do fear that it could interfer with that. Besides, I'll probably never be on the blasted site so what's the point. I'll keep it for a moment but if I don't use it often I'll delte it.