More Worries

{Kitten walks in blog sadly with fluffy tail dragging the floor and little head down cast} It has not been the best day today. Nothing personally happened to me today but for those close, it has been a rather ruff day. My brother's cat Blue, died this morning. I can't say that I was particularly close to Blue but I was sad for my brother because he had Blue since he was a kitten.

While that was sad, I got some extremely upsetting news from Cowgirl just an hour ago. You see, Cowgirl is nine months pregnant and she found out yesterday that something is wrong with placenta. She didn't tell me what the condition was called but is extremely dangerous for the baby. As of right now, the vital signs for him are all right but if she doesn't go into labor soon, there could be complications. I forgot to say that Cowgirl is past her due date. Her doctor is a complete idiot though! First off, she almost let Cowgirl get pneumonia. She kept telling her that she just had a cold. Finally, after being in the hospital three times, she went to see my father, who is her primary doctor and he put her antibiotics but it could have gotten really bad if she had waited any longer. Now, she won't do anything about this! Even Christina's mother, who has been a registered nurse for 20 some year and holds a masters said that the doctor needs to do something. She at least needs to be going in ofter to check the baby's vital signs. She told Cowgirl that th baby might have kidney problems, which was were upsetting for her. I wish there was something I could do for her. Hopefully, she will go into labor on her own in the next few days.

  

Remembering

{Kitten lays on velvet cushion in contemplation} I just visited my old highschool's website to see who they had teaching there this year. I only recognized a few names. I can't believe that most of the teachers that I had aren't even there anymore. It makes me a little sad but Kitten has been a little emotional today. It has barely been two years but so much has changed. I knew it but it didn't really hit me till now.
I' m making out my schedule for next fall and I'm a little annoyed because I can't seem to fit French in. I have put so much time in it and it would feel like a waste if I just gave up on it but don't I have to be realistic? Ok, I have made some progress on it but I haven't been able to give it the time it needs and probably won't. Between my Accounting, required classes for my major, my general studies classes and all the other little things I have to do, I just don't have the time. The only thing is, I'm not sure if that matters. I may not be able become fluent in it but even being exposed to it the little time that I am in class and doing my homework helps. Plus, I'm not just learning about a language, I'm learning about a culture. I think that is important but how do I get everything in? {sighs in flustration}
I both dread and look forward to this summer. I plan to take Principles of Marketing, College Algebra, Literature and Life, and possible Business Stats. I don't know about the Stats though, it might be too advanced seeing as I have only had Beginning Stats and I barely recieved a B in it. Plus I have got to keep up in my Accounting. What happened to the summers when I could just relax?
I'm not at all happy with my Accounting. I know that it is not going to be a good, probably around a C. Well, need to go and get to French. I have a presentation tomorrow.

A Summary of Kitten Hectic Life

Kitten apologizes for not not posting a kitty pic but I have been rather busy of late with homework{lots of homework :( } I have some much to do my little fuzzy head it spin and I feel like I'm constantly chasing my tail because nothing ever really seems to get finished.

I have been rather distant and sad of late. The reasons why are not so important but I can't seem to get rid of this lingering feeling. I don't like this...

My life is rather dull right now. Not too much going on other than a possible case study that I might be working on and a service project that I might be doing over Fall break. The days just will not slow day. I don't want this to go by so quickly. I feel like I'm doing so much but not doing anything at all. Maybe, I'm just getting acculamated to being in school again? After all we were out for 3 1/2 months.

I'm up at the dorm more than usual. I miss my kitties and my family {even though I am only 20 minutes away}. I'm also working on Thursdays this year. Schedule this one day in has been a real challenge. I don't know how people who have regular part time jobs do it. I have a hard enough time working two 4 hour days a week.

My class have been going well, albeit busy. I took my first accounting test and recieved a B in it. My first Stats test didn't go as well unfortunately but I have one tomorrow and I think it will be a lot better. Managment is rather boring but there are times it gets interesting. Test in that next Friday. Intermediate French is so challenging for me! The worst part about it is I just don't have time to give it the proper time required to fully study it. Philosophy is interesting but more demanding than I thought it would be. We did a reductio absurden(not sure if that is spelled right) today on an argument for abortion. I did pretty well, I think about refuting the argument and I think the professor was happy with me. I also have to do a presentation on the types of different deductive arguments Thursday. Systems Analysis and Design has been hard to get into but that might be expected since we have only had the class twice since the term began(three weeks ago). We only have the class on Monday's and we didn't have it last Monday because of Labor Day. There is so much reading in that class. Like 60-80 pages per week {sighs}

I sent an email to my academic adviser and asked to meet with her this week or next week to talk about either adding CIS as a second major or changing to Accounting IS. I think the latter would be more appropriate since I am foremost an accounting major but doing the second would be more difficult since I would have to take it as an individualized major. The college used to offer it but several years ago they did away with pratically all their CIS majors.

I think I am going to start blogging on a regular basis again. I forgot how much of a stress reliever it is, even if I don't have anything important to say. Listening to Japeness, classical, and celtic music with my little sis. I feel so peaceful right now. It's nice, first time in all most a month.

A Non Dramatic Post

{Kitten frolicks around blog playful chasing her tail and revelling in this cool down we are currently having}

Kitten realizes that her past post have been rather on the dramatic side of late. In my defense I have been having problems but I'm sick of talking about me, well, atleast the unhappy me. God did not promise us a happy, fair life so I might as well suck it up and get over it. I made my bed and now I have to lie in it.

I updated my goals. I had pretty much gotten through my last list made back in freshman year {highschool}. Here it is:

~Learn French fluently

~Study abroad

~Graduate College

~Become a CPA and/or CIA

~Do something I consider exciting

~Visit two countries I have not been to

~Fall in love

I've given my myself until 7-18-15 to complete this list. Let's see how it goes :)

School will be starting up in a 5 weeks! I so excited. I still have a lot to pick up but I'm starting to get things in order and organized. I just hope I can finish up my French book before class starts again. That reminds me. When classes start, probably the second or third day, I need to get in contact with my advisor and Monica so we can get things started.

That reminds me, I haven't posted in a while, so some may not know that my classes have been cancelled. I wasn't too happy about that but what really made me made was the fact that they didn't bother to send the email out until yesterday. I drove all the way into ISU, walked all the way to the build, and then, when I got to the room, found out the classes had been cancelled due to lack of enrollment. There were seven people in the class including me. I think they could have had it. If we cancelled classes at my college like that we would never have classes. I have had about four classes with seven or less people and I'll have three classes this coming term with less people.

My Lil Sis and I went out earlier this week and saw the 6th Harry Potter. It was good but I was a little distracted... we had a good time anyway. Christina was supposed to come with us but she was not able to come at the last minute.

Well Kitten better be getting to her kitty bed and counting mice in her dreams because it's way past his little feline's bedtime. See you next week.

My Goodbye

{Kitten is curles up in a little ball sad and wondering...}

Kittens feels very alone today, not literally, but mentally and emotionally. A dear friend helped me see that I did not like where my life was going and what I might become if I went down that path. Seeing what I have lost and what I have gained in exchange saddens and dissapoints me. I'm disgusted with myself and I think its going to be awhile before I'll trust myslef again, concerning men anyway.

There nothing I can do about the past but I will not repeat the same mistakes over. I want a normal life, with normal drama {whatever that is}. No more clandestined meetings, covered days, or lying in general. I have gained some foresight from my last two years into... but now it's time to move on, cut ties, and live a normal life.

I've said this before but this time I really mean it. I'm not mad at anyone, I'm not sad because of anyone person. I just feel it's time to let go...

Kitten's Emontional Rollercoaster

Kitten is feeling better than she was this morning. The first part of my day didn't start off too good. I was actually considering just walking away... I got over what was upsetting me and now I'm fine. I just wish school would start again so I would have things to keep me occupied most of the time.

Today is such a beautiful day. I should be out going for a walk. I might but I have to get on Facebook and see if Breaha is free. I hate walking bymyself. It makes me feel vulnerable for some reason.

I recieved my powerpoint from the Intercambio trip from January. I was nice to finally get it. That was what actually made my day. Don't know why, silly right?